Question Time

I still haven't messaged any illustrators, or companies and it's almost September. Why? Because I spend all of my time worrying, thats why!

This past few days I've been on my own at home trying to get on with work, and I have really struggled. I'm so annoying. Right before I go to bed I often get a surge of really cool ideas and want to do everything at once. So I sleep on it and then by the morning I am totally overwhelmed when I pick up my paint brush?

So then the worrying starts and thoughts to this affect circulate in my head:

• Am I going to go batshit crazy if I work from home? Probably.
• I hate all of my work
• Why can't I make some work that I like?
• No one has bought anything from my shop yet!
• Please buy things I am poor
• I had so many good ideas yesterday and they all look shit
• UGH
• Why did I decide to be an artist?
• Should I be doing something else?
• Oh god I picked the wrong degree.
• Why do people tell me I am good at art when I feel like I suck at it?
• Are they lying to me?
• EVERYONE IS TELLING ME LIES
• I AM going batshit crazy, as we speak
• Okay lets have a break and make some food
• Cry

Hahaha so thats me when I don't have proper human contact for more than 48 hours^^

Thinking about my personality type, I'm not a laid back, self driven introvert (perfect illustrator candidate?). Instead I am a sporadic extrovert who has no self confidence the attention span of a five year old. Which isn't always a bad thing, but I have realised that in order to thrive career wise, I need a balance of working with people and working alone. 

This is somewhat frustrating, as in an ideal world I will probably need to shape my ways of working with my state of being which isn't always the simplest of tasks. But hey ho what is life without a challenge...? 

Messaging Practitioners

Coming back to the topic of asking illustrators questions, I think it would be a good idea to contact practitioners who freelance as well as teach part time, as I'm thinking that this is the direction I would eventually like to go in! 

For example, Jenna Lee Alldread, whom I occasionally work with on the children's art school as part of my student ambassador job. Jenna freelances at Tigerprint as well as lecturing at Nottingham Trent University and leading workshops at LCA. Jenna is so friendly and easy to talk to, so I might ask her ,as well as other like minded practitioners, about their routes into teaching and juggling a busy creative schedule etc.

I also plan to contact agencies and studios for advice on how to promote myself, and what would be expected of a candidate wanting to work for them.

If you're reading this you're probably thinking that I say 'I plan to' a bit too much which I completely admit I do because I put things off for as long as possible if I am in any way worried about it. 

After writing out countless drafts, I started by sending two emails:

Lize Meddings

(founder of the Sad Ghost Club)

Jenna Alldread

I hope they are polite/professional enough without sounding weird?

But yay I have made a start!

I'm not going to go crazy emailing practitioners left right and centre, but I think I might try and send one email a day? Or when I see someones work I like, think of questions to ask and jot them down straight away. 

As for emailing agencies and other companies, I honestly don't feel ready yet. I know its only an email and I'm not introducing myself face to face, but I'd much rather wait until I'm in a better more confident place work wise, so if they ask to see my work I can be proud of it instead of hesitant and worried.